


The Prince and His Knight - Part 4

by KinFletcher



Series: MMX Royal AU [4]
Category: Rockman X | Mega Man X
Genre: First Kiss, Fluff, Injury, M/M, Nightmares, Sleeping Together, Violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-09
Updated: 2016-05-11
Packaged: 2018-06-07 09:54:28
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 9,273
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6799138
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KinFletcher/pseuds/KinFletcher
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Zero makes his way back to Abel, only to be forced to flee with X to Giga City when a civil war erupts.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. From the Jaws of Death

**Author's Note:**

> Psyche! We all knew the bad end to MMX5 isn't canon, right? ;)

            Dim light filtered through Zero’s eyelids. The world smelled musty, and his mouth tasted like blood and salt. He licked his lips.

            “Goddamnit,” he whispered. _I’m still alive_. He laid with his eyes closed for a moment, trying to decide whether to go back to unconsciousness and just die, but his entire soul disallowed it. He cracked his eyes open, still swearing internally. The sky was uncomfortably bright; white and cloudless. He took a moment to evaluate his body and immediately regretted it. It seemed like every part of him ached and stung. He recalled bitterly the day he had woken up on the battlefield three years ago. _Only three years ago?_ he thought. _I feel a thousand years old at the moment_.

            Groaning, he tried to push himself up. It seemed that his wrists were sore but working, but every movement of his torso opened up wounds. He sucked in a breath as he felt warm blood seeping down his belly, and looked around. He wasn’t in the stables anymore. Baffled, he tried to twist his neck and observe his surroundings. His head pounded. He was still in Wily’s town, it seemed, near the gates where he had first entered. Nine flat stones had been placed carefully in a ring around his head; the customary grave marker in Abel. A light blue cloak lay on the ground next to him.

            It suddenly struck him that X must have tried to bring him back to his own horse and then given up and left this makeshift “grave” for him. His heart stung as he remembered the prince’s desperate sobs; he wondered how the prince was faring. It seemed that he had at least escaped Wily’s town. He imagined X placing his cloak over Zero’s unconscious body and then climbing onto his horse and burying his face in her mane.

            It took about half an hour for Zero to get to his feet, picking up the cloak, and in that time he found that more than one of his ribs was broken. He let out strings of curses and held himself up against the crumbling wall of the building next to him, trying to ignore each prick of pain as his wounds opened again. Wearily, he reached around to touch his back and found ragged skin but no splinters.

            _He even went to the trouble of trying to mend me_ , he thought. _Goddamnit, X. You’ll always be too kind for your own good._

            His vision blurred momentarily and he fought to keep himself conscious. He realized that he didn’t even know how long it had been since he last ate or drank. If he could get back to the stables, maybe he could steal Sigma and Colonel’s rations, and one of their horses… He thanked the heavens that it was spring; otherwise he surely would have died of exposure. As it stood his skin was burned, but the shadow of the building seemed to have kept him sheltered.

            With the faint glint of hope in mind, he tried to pull himself together and took one step, then another, and another. His legs ached and his chest hurt each time he took a breath. His back complained with every jarring motion. He had to stop every few houses just to catch his breath and try not to faint. He hated it. Once or twice, he almost lost his footing on the tangled ground and had to catch himself; his wrists and knees screamed. Once he did actually lose his footing and collapsed, passing out again, but he woke once more, angrily, and dragged himself up. Along the road he saw little streaks of blood where X must have pulled his unconscious body along.

            Finally the stables were in sight, and Zero rejoiced. He craned his head to look for Colonel and Sigma, but as he approached, he saw only Colonel. He would have been frustrated if he was not so ready to lay down and die. As it was, he was relieved to see that Sigma had at least left Colonel’s horse, pack and all, behind. The false king had obviously gone through the city’s southern gate; once again Zero thanked the heavens. His body and grave would have been easily spotted, and this also meant that Sigma hadn’t gone chasing after X.

            Zero swore as he fumbled at the gate to the horse’s stall, fingers refusing to work. There were welts on his wrists. Finally it opened, and he collapsed on the side of the horse, which complained quietly at him.

            “Oh. Hungry… you’re hungry,” said Zero quietly, digging through the pouches for something to feed the horse. Thankfully, Colonel had kept his Abel horse, which knew Zero from more than two years spent going to the stables nearly every day.

            The apples were soft and wrinkled, but the horse ate them eagerly and snuffed at Zero’s hands for more, but Zero was already looking through the bags for something that he himself could eat. After nearly emptying a skin of water, he found a pouch of nuts and stuffed them into his mouth. It made his head hurt to chew, and finally having food in his stomach after so long just made him nauseated, but Zero forced himself to eat the entire pouch.

            Mounting the horse was more than a struggle, but when Zero was finally on, he slumped gratefully against its neck. The heavy warhorse shook its head and weaved back and forth, eager to move again. Fighting to stay awake, Zero managed to get one arm through the sleeve of the blue cloak he had managed to hold on to, and tied the horse’s reigns to his arms. He then set it on the path west out of the city, toward Abel, and fainted.

 

-

 

            The swooning feeling of blacking out became familiar to Zero over the proceeding days. Every few hours he would wake, try to direct the horse towards the direction the sun set, eat a little, and then pass out again. He tried his best to dismount and feed the warhorse after he felt like a day had passed, but time grew unfamiliar to him, and his strength was waning rather than returning. The terrain, at least, started to change from the gray wastelands between Abel and Maverick, and Abel’s wildflowers and springtime fields began to appear.

            Zero tried to tie X’s cloak around himself more tightly to block up the wounds which would not stop bleeding, but the cloth against his back only made them sting more, so he gave up and used the thing as a pillow. He wished that it still held X’s scent, but that had been erased in the smell of death and char in Wily’s city.

            He was just beginning to wonder if the whole journey was even worth it, as blisters appeared on his bare sun-exposed shoulders, when in the distance he saw a village. Exultant, he pushed weakly at the horse. He could think of nothing but X. Had the prince reached Abel in time for them to stop General and his band of soldiers?

            People stopped their work and stared as Zero and the horse finally made it into the little town, and to Zero’s relief, one of them was a patrolling soldier. The man dropped his spear when he saw Zero, mouth open in disbelief. He ran to his side.

            “Lieutenant Zero?” he gasped as he reached them.

            Zero nodded. “Is Abel safe?” he asked thickly.

            The soldier nodded. “As far as I know, sir. There was a little battle two days ago, sir, but the enemy was outnumbered.”

            “Thank God,” said Zero, and fainted.

           


	2. Drifting

            The continual drift between waking confusion and unconscious fever dreams was really beginning to frustrate Zero. Each time he managed to open his eyes, he didn’t have enough time to collect his thoughts before pain sent him spiraling back into darkness. Somewhere he understood that he was in the hospital, and the whole thing was almost exactly as it had been three years previous; the same bitter liquids, same blue curtains and white sheets, only at least this time he wasn’t chained down.

            When the doctor finally let him stay awake more than a few moments, he savored the pain that breathing sent to his ribs; at least it was something to feel. He was glad to see Signas when the captain stepped inside.

            “I’m happy to see that you’re alive and awake, lieutenant,” said Signas, giving an unusual display of fondness. He still stood with his hands clasped behind his back, but concern echoed in his voice and expression.

            “You’re back from Doppler,” croaked Zero. His head hurt.

            “Ah, well… I would say that I don’t wish to trouble you with military matters while you’re bedridden, but we both know you’d insist anyway.” He sighed, shoulders drooping a little. “I am needed more immediately here in Abel.”

            Zero opened his mouth to ask for details, but Signas held up a hand.

            “I won’t tell you any more now, Zero. You need to sleep. We’ll make things right, don’t worry.”

            Zero let his head fall back on his pillow, too tired to argue. Signas lifted the curtain to leave, hesitated, and looked back.

            “I’ll send Prince X to you tomorrow, lieutenant,” he said, with a small smile. He left.

 

-

 

            Zero had insisted that he bathe before X came the next day, despite the doctor’s best efforts to dissuade him. He thought his body didn’t look so bad; the marks on his front weren’t infected, and his sunburns had already turned to a harsh tan. It still hurt to breathe and move, and he didn’t know how his back looked, but he still managed to bathe and change himself. He walked back to his hospital bed, smirking. The doctor shook his head and sighed.

            As soon as X threw open the curtains, Zero’s smile disappeared. The prince was utterly disheveled. It looked like he hadn’t eaten or slept in days. His hair was tangled and his face gaunt.

            “Don’t cry,” said Zero, wincing when he saw the prince’s expression.

            “You bastard,” said X, eliciting a sound of surprise from Zero. “You don’t _do_ that. You don’t die and then come back. Do you have any idea… Oh my God…”

            To the doctor’s chagrin, X threw himself on Zero, half-hugging and half-strangling him. Zero closed his eyes and put a hand on the prince’s shoulder.

            “I’m so sorry, X. I’m still here.”

            X drew back, shaking but not crying. He drew a chair up to the side of the bed and began scrutinizing Zero, squinting suspiciously at his wrists and brushing his blonde fringe aside to look at the marks on his forehead.

            The doctor left, mumbling something about the lavatory.

            “Really, I’m feeling much better,” said Zero. “I made it all the way to the bathing room and back all by myself.” He tried to add a note of sarcasm to make X laugh, but the prince only looked at him sternly.

            “How are the whip marks?” he asked.

            Zero tried to shrug.

            “That must have hurt your pride a lot,” said X, looking at the bedside table with his brow furrowed. “Getting humiliated like that.”

            “There were worse things that happened that day,” said Zero, thinking of Sigma’s remarks about the prince and the haunting portrait in Wily’s castle.

            “Let me see,” said X, reaching for his shirt.

            “What? No, I meant… not physically…” but X was already unlacing the hospital clothing, and it sent heat pooling to Zero’s hips. He bunched up the covers, staring at the prince, but X apparently saw nothing. He was looking at the jagged whip marks as though he himself had been wounded.

            “I don’t ever want to let somebody do that to you again,” he said quiet, running a finger lightly across the deepest of the marks.

            Zero relaxed slightly at the prince’s soft touch. “It’s not your fault. You’re blaming yourself, aren’t you?”

            X sat back, sighing. “I’m the prince. Technically I’m of age now and I should have taken over the throne. Everybody ought to be my responsibility.” He looked at his hands.

            “Bad things happen to everybody,” said Zero. “You can’t take all of that on your own shoulders.”

            X didn’t respond for a long time.

            Finally, he broke the silence. “I still can’t believe you’re alive.”

            “Me, neither,” said Zero, laying back on the bed and looking at X’s ponderous eyes. Even filled with sadness, they were as beautiful as ever. The voice in him that loved the prince begged to kiss him. He wished things could be that simple.

            Suddenly he remembered Signas’ visit the day before.

            “Signas said there’s something going on in the city,” he said, shaking X out of his reverie.

            X bit his lip and looked guilty. “Maybe… maybe you should go back to sleep, Zero.”

            “Damn it, why are you trying to hide it from me? What happened? I’m a lieutenant, for God’s sake, I deserve to know!”

            Zero stopped himself and took a few quick breaths, trying to calm himself from the sudden spur of anger.

            X’s shoulders sagged, and then he leaned forward and rested his head on the side of the bed, against Zero’s arm.

            “Some bastard Doppler official named Gate has been going around Abel telling everybody you’re a traitor,” he said into the covers.

            “So what? Lots of people have been thinking I’m a traitor the whole time I’ve been here.”

            “It’s different now,” said X, turning his head and looking at the pillows. “He says it’s convenient how an attack was launched while you disappeared, and how you’ve become a lieutenant so quickly, and… other things…” he flushed, but continued. “Once you got back and word got out you’d come from Wily’s city, and on Colonel’s horse, everything just… fell apart. Everyone’s angry that my uncle won’t put you in prison.”

            Zero stared at the ceiling. He tried desperately to follow his own advice and not blame himself for the apparent turmoil in Abel.

            “What are we going to do about it?” he asked.

            X shrugged. “We’ve been waiting for you to recover before we try to send out missives explaining everything that happened. I mean, I was there. I saw you getting attacked. It was Double’s fault, not yours.”

            The doctor entered again and X sat up.

            “Your Highness, I’m afraid it’s time for you to leave. I need to examine Zero after his venture out today,” he shot a glare at Zero, “and it’s well past time he was asleep again.”

            X nodded, cast one last apologetic glance at Zero, and then left.

            Zero let the doctor look at his injuries, smear on salves and bandages, and then administer the bitter liquid that sent him plunging into sleep.

            This time, he dreamed.

            And when he dreamed, he dreamed of tearing X apart.

 

-

 

            He was shaken out of his drugged slumber; someone was holding his shoulder, talking to him urgently. Groggy, cold, and confused, Zero tried to open his eyes. The image of X’s shredded neck was burned in his mind, the blood on his hands and the laughter now closer than it had been before. He coughed and tried to sit up, pain lancing through his ribs.

            Signas was looking at him, face hard, steel-blue eyes dark. Zero blinked hard and tried to recover his thoughts.

            “… out of here,” were the first words he discerned.

            “Captain,” Zero said, pushing himself upright and struggling to see in the darkness. “I apologize. Please repeat what you said.”

            “Vile’s escaped from prison,” said Signas. Zero’s heart thudded. He had heard that Vile was a vicious criminal. But what could Zero do to help in this state?

            “Gate’s used it as more fuel for the fire against you,” continued Signas. “He’s been gathering townspeople and some are leaving towards Maverick. It’s not safe for you or Prince X here any longer.”

            A chill ran down Zero’s arms. He was fully awake now, afraid and guilty. “Will Cain put me in prison?” he asked, forgetting his formalities.

            “No. The king regent wants you to take half of special brigade 0 and escort Prince X to Giga City. You are to take refuge there until Gate is exposed for his slander. Speak to Captain Marino. The hope is that you will return with more soldiers to support us.”

            The blood drained from Zero’s face. “Are you certain? Won’t it be dangerous for the prince to show himself in public?”

            “Sergeant Aster will be covering for him,” said Signas. “He’ll ride in disguise as the prince. Hurry, get up. You need to leave out the west gates before morning comes and the townspeople are all awake.”

           


	3. Three Years

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a retcon'd version of the first piece I posted for this AU! I altered it a bit so that it fits into the story, but it's largely the same <3

            It was going to be a particularly dangerous escort mission, Zero thought bitterly, as the team of horses made their way past the outskirts of the castle town. It was both fortunate and unfortunate that dark clouds were forming in the night sky. Zero knew that a storm would mask the sounds of their own movement, but would also make it more difficult to detect an ambush and traverse the difficult path they had ahead of them. His nerves sang as the small troop left the west gate and wove their way down into the farmland outside, but even as he looked back he saw no-one approaching them.

            As they passed into the countryside, Zero stole a glance at X. He knew that the king-to-be was nervous, but it didn’t show on his face. He was playing his role as a soldier in disguise well. Up ahead, a scout rode dressed in the floral robes of Abel royalty. It was odd to see X in the leather and chainmail of the guard’s uniform, and Zero would not admit to himself that some part of him liked it. He set his jaw and focused on the ground in front of his horse as the company rode on.

            After two days of riding and camping in the mountains, the clouds finally burst and rain poured down, quickly turning the grey days into a tempest. Zero felt sorry for X, who was not accustomed to riding in such weather, but the prince rode straight-backed with his jaw set, never uttering a complaint. It was strange to go so long without hearing his voice, but Zero himself had ordered that the prince remain as silent as possible. His royal-bred accent would stick out like a sore thumb among the rough soldiers. A small wince of guilt stuck in his throat when he remembered the way X had bitten his lip when he heard that command.

            Zero tried to stay as quiet and reticent as the prince despite the ache in this ribs and the stinging pain with every lurch of his horse’s stride.

            The plan was to ride through the nights and rest in the mornings, but as they reached the forests and the waterlogged paths brought one of their horses toppling down, Zero made the decision to stop for the night. The sodden soldiers pitched camouflaged tents under a thick clump of firs, but the trees did little to mask the storm. Zero worried about the noise of the rain and set two extra guards to keep watch in shifts. He steeled himself from the guilt at asking his soldiers to stay awake through the bone-aching cold and wet. Luckily, the group at least seemed to understand his concerns about lighting fires. “We probably couldn’t find any dry wood anyway,” one remarked, but the mood was as damp as their bedrolls as they all chewed on salted meat and nut rations.

            Zero took the first watch and observed Prince X as he quietly set up his soldier’s bedroll, making no glances toward the decadent seal-skin tent set up for his decoy. Zero wished that he could give X an extra blanket or cloak to keep him dry, but he knew that he had to treat the prince in disguise like any soldier.

            The hours went by slowly and the rain made him ache down to his bones, but Zero sat vigilantly past his appointed time before finally waking up the brigadier to replace him. He kept his sword curled in his fist as he laid down, still, fully aware of how close they were to no man’s land. He tried to let the sounds of thunder lull him to sleep—they were somehow familiar—and his eyes were so tired, but it was still many hours before the captain could force himself to relax.

 

-

 

            He was running down the polished tiles of Cain’s palace, sword in hand. Outside the windows, fire licked at the walls. He had to reach X, save him, but the harder he tried to run the slower he moved. Furious, he wrenched himself forward, but the hallway only drew longer before him.

            He looked over his shoulder to find the prince and regent king Cain just behind him, fleeing from the hulking form of King Sigma. Zero tried to reverse direction, but the floor pulled him down and he fell hard on his hands with a loud  _slap_. His wrists screamed with the weight of the fall.

            When he looked up, all three figures were laughing at him, and suddenly he realized that Cain and X hadn’t been running from Sigma, but  _with_  him. Rage bubbled up in him as he tried to claw his way to his feet, but some how he couldn’t, as though the tiles had turned to quicksand. King Regent Cain reached him first and dragged him up, holding a dagger to his back. A spasm of rage surged through Zero and he swung his sword furiously, sending Cain’s head rolling on the floor.

            Windows shattered as the fire came thrashing into the hall. Zero tore his eyes away from the sight of Cain’s crown shimmering with blood and looked up to find Sigma with X at his side.

            “Look what you’ve done, Zero,” chided Sigma, as X hid his face in the mad king’s cape, shaking. “He saved you and you betrayed him.”

            “He was—” Zero began, but choked to a stop as X threw his head back; Zero realized he had been shaking with laughter, not tears. The prince drew his rapier with a maniacal grin.

            “You deserve to be punished,” Sigma drawled. “X is king now, so I believe he is the one who deals with that sort of thing.”

            Zero stood rooted to the spot, panting with fear and rage. Suddenly X dashed towards him and lifted him up by his collar as though he was weightless. For one terrifying moment, Zero dangled in the air, and then the prince threw him to the glass-covered floor. Zero stared at the fire billowing up behind Sigma, breath knocked from his lungs. X fell upon him and straddled him, seizing his collar again and leaning down until their faces were inches apart. Zero’s vision started to go red as intense anger and dread flared in his stomach. He tried to hold X’s stare; fire reflected in the prince’s intense green eyes. He found himself itching to plunge his sword between X’s ribs and it terrified him.

            “I know you want me, Zero,” said the prince, and Zero’s heart stopped. “It’s so obvious, isn’t it?” He threw back his head again and laughed. “A knight and a king? You’re ridiculous.” He slammed Zero’s head into the floor. Zero’s vision flashed. “You would assassinate me, wouldn’t you? Then you’d be king.” Zero struggled for his weapon as the prince—no, king now—leaned down and ran his tongue up Zero’s jaw to his ear, snickering. He felt his sword in his hand but couldn't seem to move it; his mind was torn between an intense and horrifying thirst for blood and the desire to prove X wrong--he wouldn't assassinate X. Would he?

            The fire was growing louder and louder, like a storm. He heard himself screaming, but his voice was not his own.

 

            -

 

            Zero woke in a cold sweat and sat bolt upright. Chaos surrounded him; soldiers rushed to defend their camp as the sentries shouted.  _Mavericks_. Their distinctive violet cloaks glittered in the rain. How had they found them out here, so far away from their country? Zero struggled up, ribs screaming, slipping on his bedroll, gripped his sword tightly, and looked for the prince. His heart squeezed when he saw the prince on his feet, sword in hand, ready to fight, fear and determination in his eyes. Zero tried to shake away the memories of his nightmare.

            As the seal-skin tent was slashed open and blood mixed with the rain soaking the soil, Zero seized his bag and X’s wrist without a thought and dragged him towards his horse, hidden nearby. Maverick soldiers spilled into the camp as Zero frantically untied the horse from the fir. The horse bucked in fear as two violet-cloaked soldiers approached them. Zero held desperately to its reigns, swearing.

            X wrenched his arm free from Zero’s grip and turned to face the soldiers. Zero bit back a cry as X flew into a single-handed duel with the two soldiers. As he calmed the horse, Zero watched, dazed. He couldn’t help but be impressed at the speed and skill that the prince possessed; he dispatched the soldiers easily without hesitation and turned back to Zero, eyes sad and afraid. As the sounds of thunder and clashing weapons and screams filled the thicket of trees, Zero yanked the saddle off of the horse, helped the prince up, then hoisted himself up in front and shook the reigns. As they galloped away, Zero risked a single glance back to see if they were being followed. They weren’t.

 

            -

 

            The horse tired far too quickly for Zero’s taste, but it gave him an opportunity to guide it more carefully and ensure that they didn’t leave tracks as they made their way up the mountainside, far from any beaten pathways. He was sure that it was past morning by now, but the clouds and rain made the world nearly as black as night. He was grateful for the cover of darkness despite the cold sheets that ran down his face and into his eyes and mouth. X, disconcertingly, hadn’t said a word the entire journey, but Zero forced himself to focus on finding the perfect hiding spot before they stopped.

            When they dismounted, Zero fed the horse and tied it up, then walked out of sight of the beast, scanning the area for the best place to rest. The mountain was thick with trees and marked with little outcrops of rock and overhangs, but Zero pressed forward, covering their tracks, until they found a cavity almost completely shielded by brush and low-hanging tree branches. Once he had ensured that the area was clear, he finally turned to Prince X, and started when he saw that the prince’s eyes were filled with tears.

            “X,” he said, voice hoarse. He cleared his throat. “What’s wrong?”

            “We abandoned them,” said X, looking down at his feet. “What if they all died? What if we could have stayed and helped them? Poor Aster…”

            Zero looked down, trying to think of an adequately comforting response. Of course X would remember the name of the soldier who had acted as his double. He was too kind for his own good.

            “He knew what the consequences could be when he volunteered for the role,” Zero said slowly. “You saw how many there were… There was nothing we could have done. We’re lucky to have gotten away with you alive.”

            “Why is my life worth so much more than theirs?” said X wearily. Zero looked at him silently, heart sinking. X sat down hard on the floor of the grotto and began disconsolately picking fir needles from his clothing. Zero knelt awkwardly beside him, unsure what to do or say. As he was able to gather his thoughts, the sense of defeat settled on his shoulders as well. He had lost some of the brigadiers he had spent the last three years training with.

            “They must really all be dead,” said the prince drearily.

            “Perhaps some of them escaped like we did,” Zero suggested, silently willing it to be true. The prince hung his head and leaned forward, dropping it on Zero’s shoulder. Zero closed his eyes and sighed, putting an arm around X.

            “You should rest,” he said, after some time.

            X nodded, rubbing away his tears with a wet sleeve. “You should as well,” he insisted. “You were awake for so long last night.”

            “How did you know?” said Zero, taken aback.

            “I just… saw how tense you were. And then you had nightmares, didn’t you?”

            Zero flushed, recalling the X from his dreams.

            X dropped his gaze to the cave floor. “Aster said you always have nightmares when you’re travelling.”

            “It’s not just when I’m travelling,” said Zero, utterly baffled. If X knew he had been awake, then the prince himself must have been awake as well. And X had been talking to Aster about him? How did his soldiers know that he had nightmares? Was it that obvious?

            He shook his head. “My dreams don’t matter. You should really sleep; we’ll need to make our way back to Cain as quickly as we can.”

            “They do matter…” said X quietly, but didn’t press the subject. He removed the outer pieces of his leather armor and pushed them into a vaguely pillow-shaped lump on the stone and dirt floor, then curled up with his face away from the mouth of the grotto and shivered. Zero wished sorely that he had more cover to give him. The saddle blanket had gone with the saddle when he’d taken the horse.

            He sat restlessly opposite X, watching the trees as rain cascaded down their branches. Little rivulets made their ways through the leaf-littered ground. Thunder still rolled in the sky, but the storm was beginning to wane, it seemed, even if the rain was still coming down in icy sheets.

            It was an hour or two later when he felt a hand on his shoulder and jumped.

            “Zero,” said the prince, “Please sleep.”

            X was shivering all over, normally immaculate hair knotted in places, cheeks smeared with mud. Zero liked something about the look, but pushed the thought away.

            “We could have been followed.” he said.

            “I watched our backs the entire time. There wasn’t anybody in sight. And there’s no way that they would find us in this place, especially not in this storm.” He bit his lip. “And… I’m really cold.”

            Zero looked down. “I wish that I had something more to keep you warm, but my bedroll was left with yours back at the camp.”

            X shook his head. “I meant if… If we slept together, it would make both of us warmer.”

            Zero tried to keep the flush from creeping up into his cheeks. The thought of sleeping with X, body to body… He opened and closed his mouth a few times, trying to think of something to say in response, but gave up and simply shrugged, moving to the back of the grotto with the prince.

            Admittedly it was among the most uncomfortable places Zero had slept in all his days as a soldier, but as he folded X in his arms, trying his utmost to keep his heartbeat normal, he silently rejoiced. The prince tucked his head underneath Zero’s chin and whispered a thank-you, and Zero’s heart melted in his chest. The prince’s hair smelled of earth and rain. Zero tried to stay awake as long as he could just to savor the feeling of the prince curled up against him, breathing quietly, but eventually exhaustion took him over and he slept.

 

            -

 

            Zero felt X’s hands around his throat, nails digging into his skin. Straining to see through the darkness, he gasped for air, panic sweeping down his arms. Frantically, he looked down for his sword and found that he had been stripped naked.

            “You killed them all,” the prince spat. “Aster and some of your best soldiers. You killed them. It’s your fault.”

            Zero tried to open his mouth to say that he hadn’t meant for them to die, that he’d only been trying to save the prince, that maybe some were still alive, but X leaned down and kissed him hard. Warmth spread up into Zero’s stomach, but it was quickly replaced by fear and anger as X bit his lip hard and their teeth clacked together.

            “Is this what you wanted?” he hissed into Zero’s mouth. “Did you do it so you could be with me?” He ran his fingers down Zero’s chest, and to Zero’s horror his nails made tracks in his skin that welled up with blood. Zero clawed back at him, but X jumped back. “Pathetic,” spat the prince, and he slapped him across the face.

 

            -

 

            Zero woke with a start again, chest heaving.

            “Zero?” X’s voice was soft. “I’m so sorry, I tried to wake you up but you wouldn’t… I didn’t hurt you, did I?”

            Zero swallowed hard and reached up to touch the light sting on his cheek.

            “Am I awake?” he asked, voice more broken than he had intended it to sound.

            X looked sad. “It’s been a few hours, I think. Then you started shaking and… whimpering. I figured you were having another nightmare.”

            Zero’s cheeks burned in shame. “I’m sorry.”

            “What were you dreaming about?”

            Zero swallowed. He didn’t trust himself to lie well enough for X to believe it.

            “I was… You were… Ah, you were angry with me. You said it was my fault that everyone died.”

            X pulled his knees up to his chest. “I’m sad, not mad. And I don’t think it’s your fault. You’re the best lieutenant the army has had since I was young. You would have fought all of those Maverick soldiers away if you could have.”

            Zero clenched his jaw. X’s hand found his and squeezed it. Zero’s fingers went numb.

            “Do you have dreams like that a lot?” the prince asked.

            “Ah… I suppose,” said Zero, trying to suppress memories of the dream the night before.

            “I do sometimes too,” said X. “Like something bad happened and it’s my fault.”

            Zero didn’t know how to respond to that. They sat in silence for a while.

            “Thank you for keeping me warm,” said X. “It was… nice. I’ve never slept with someone before.”

            It was Zero’s turn to blush. “Do you want to go back to sleep?” he asked, trying to keep the wistfulness out of his voice.

            “I’d really like that, yes,” said X quietly.

            It felt more natural this time; X’s body fit against his somehow, softly. His head against Zero’s chest, arms wrapped around his waist. Zero rested a hand softly on X’s back. The prince murmured something too quiet to make out as he drifted off to sleep again.

            Zero’s sleep was dreamless this time.

 

            -

 

            When he woke again, X’s hands were tangled in his hair, one knee between his legs, face buried in his chest, a tiny line of drool staining his shirt. Zero smiled softly and shut his eyes for a while longer, imagining that they were in one of the soft beds of the royal chambers, well-rested and safe, perhaps wearing a little less…

            He set his jaw, once again pushing the thoughts away. He chided himself for indulging in such an unrealistic daydream and gently shook the prince awake.

            “We need to get going, X,” he said stiffly. “It’s night by now, and it should be safer to travel.”

            When they found the horse and mounted it again, X leaned against Zero’s back, wrapping his arms around his waist, and after a while Zero realized that the prince, accustomed to a regular schedule of sleep, was probably exhausted. But they rode in silence, and X stayed awake, for several hours as the storm slowly receded. They stopped a few times for rations, and Zero was thankful that he had thought to grab his pack, which held provisions for much more than the time it would take to get to Giga City (he hoped).

            By the time the horse was tired again, the rain had finally stopped and the clouds parted to reveal a fresh, starry night sky. Zero reckoned there were a few hours until dawn. They had made it past the highest part of the mountains and down into more forested areas.

            When Zero felt X’s arms loosening around his waist and the prince snoring softly, he decided it was time to stop again. He fed and watered the horse, tying it once again to a tree, and found a set of stone outcrops with a thick fir tree and gorse at their open side, which created a shelter even better hidden than their last one.

            More confident now that they were safe from pursuers (and more than a little motivated by his hidden feelings), Zero agreed to sleep with X again to keep him warm, as the night was still cold and their clothing still soaked with rainwater. But as the prince slept, Zero found himself restless, thinking of their journey to Giga City, and then back to Abel. Would there be another rest like this? His heart ached at the thought of never holding X like this again, and he regretted ever doing so in the first place.

            After an hour or two of the painful line of thinking, Zero carefully extricated himself from X’s arms and went to sit by the open end of the artificial grotto. The sky was still dark through the needles of the tree. Zero’s eyes itched as he counted the stars.

            “Zero?”

            His heart twisted at the prince’s soft voice.

            “Is something the matter? Did you have a nightmare?”

            Zero’s jaw felt as tight as a rusted pauldron. X was moving towards him.

            “I think… I think it would be best if we didn’t sleep together,” said Zero, a little louder than he had intended. He tried not to look, but out of the corner of his eye he could see X’s surprised and pained expression.

            “I’m sorry, Zero. It must make your nightmares worse, I wasn’t thinking—”

            “It’s not your fault,” Zero interrupted. He took a deep breath through his nose. “I think… I think that I shouldn’t allow myself to grow accustomed to it.”

            His vision blurred as his heart pounded in his throat. X was quiet for one nerve-wracking moment.

            “I wouldn’t mind still sleeping with you when we get back,” the prince said quietly.

            Zero turned to stare at him, heartbeat seething in his head. X gazed sheepishly back at him.

            “What… What do you mean?”

            X sighed and cast his eyes towards the ceiling of the makeshift shelter. “Tall, rugged, handsome, my best friend and guardian… I love you. I thought it was obvious.”

            Zero blinked once. Twice. Swallowed. Opened his mouth and closed it again.

            “It was obvious that you like me too,” said X, voicing his confession for him.

            “Damn it,” said Zero, unable to hide his flush now. He unstuck his tongue again and said, “Why didn’t you say something sooner?”

            X giggled. “I don’t know, I thought maybe you didn’t want to get into it.”

            Zero threw his hands up, utterly flabbergasted. “All this damn time you already knew, and reciprocated it, just, why—we could have… ugh.” He caught himself spluttering and stopped to take a breath. The realization of what was going on was starting to sink in and his heart was racing so fast he could hardly see. The little voice in his head was singing. “I do want to get into it, X,” he finished.

            X grinned coyly and cocked an eyebrow. “Oh?”

            “ _Damn it_ ,” said Zero again, but he couldn’t bring himself to be angry. He reached out to X, who crawled to the back of the shelter, giggling. Zero followed, beginning to laugh himself, until he found himself pinning X against the floor. He stopped for a moment to look at the X, green eyes illuminated by the faint starlight. His fair, dirt-stained skin stirred something insatiable in Zero, but the lieutenant held himself back, savoring the anticipation and the sight of his prince pinned beneath him—happy, laughing.

            X reached up and cupped Zero’s face in his hands, running a thumb over his mouth. Zero’s lips parted naturally, and X grinned, a shy yet wicked glint in his eyes. “Zero,” he said. “Is it too soon for me to ask for a kiss?”

            Zero tried to clear his head and failed. “I’ve wanted to kiss you for three goddamn years.”

            “Good,” said X, and pulled him down, hesitating for one breathtaking moment before brushing his lips against Zero’s.

            Zero unraveled immediately, sinking down into the softness of the kiss, burying himself in X’s mouth, clumsily, arms shaking, mind exploding with numb excitement. X’s lips parted with a sweep of air and Zero gathered the prince up in his arms. He angled his head and his nerves burst into flames at the feeling of the prince’s warm breath in his mouth. It was sour and tasted like their rations, but Zero loved it. All his years of craving came roaring up in him as X’s hands tangled into his hair and legs hooked around his waist, urging him on, pulling him closer. Shivering warmth spread from Zero’s heart downward. He drew back, letting out a trembling sigh.

            “Am I dreaming?” he whispered.

            X nuzzled a kiss onto his jaw. “I don’t think I’m dreaming. My dreams are never this satisfying.”

            “And mine are never this happy,” Zero responded.

            He smiled and let himself down onto the floor of the shelter—the sanctuary—propping himself up on his side. X scooted closer and tugged on his shirt, brushing kisses down his neck. Zero’s head felt like a crown of sparks as he put a hand on the prince’s shoulder.

            “Don’t,” he urged. X drew back and looked at him, concerned.

            “We owe it to each other… to take this slowly… do you think?”

            X paused, letting his head drop on the floor. “I have to admit that the idea of doing this bathed and under silk sheets sounds a little better than our current circumstances.”

            Zero couldn’t repress a shudder of delight. “Could we really…”

            “I’m the prince,” said X. Zero smiled at the pomp in his voice. “I can make it happen.”

            “In that case,” said Zero, looking into the prince’s face, “Be careful. I might not be able to resist those princely charms.” He made a wry smile.

            X laughed and kissed him. “Okay,” he whispered between Zero’s lips. “We can’t have you screaming while we’re out here, can we? Someone might find us.”

            “ _Me_  screaming?” said Zero. After a moment, “Me _screaming_?” He tried to keep the thrill out of his voice. “I never realized what ideas you hid behind those big innocent eyes.”

            X drew back, blushing and chewing on his lip in the most charming way. “Shut up,” he said. Zero barked a laugh and hugged him.

 


	4. Giga City

            The next morning came too soon, as Zero had suspected it would.

            He woke far earlier than X. The sleeping prince breathed quietly, face nestled against his shoulder, one hand curled in his shirt. Sunlight filtered through the ceiling of their sanctuary, and the world smelled of wet leaves and pine. Zero simply laid there for a time, breathing as quietly as he could so as not to wake X, pondering the night before. He could hardly bring himself to believe that it had really happened, but the memories were fresh and gentle—nothing like his dreams ever were.  His heart throbbed with… what? Gratitude? Relief? Whatever it was, it was warm and fluttering, and he closed his eyes, trying to write the moment into his mind for ever. He pressed the sleeping prince close to him, three years of longing releasing in a sigh of relief.

            Zero felt X wake up when the prince hummed quietly and turned his head. He nuzzled a kiss into the crook of Zero neck. Zero’s heart thudded loudly, and he tangled his fingers into the prince’s hair. X shifted to look up and gave Zero a sleepy smile that made parts of his soul unlatch. Zero leaned down and kissed him.

            The prince’s lips parted easily and he made another soft humming sound, yielding to the lieutenant’s every movement. His arm, which had rested lazily around Zero’s waist, came up to stroke his face. His cold fingers sent sparks around Zero’s head. Zero stopped the kiss to lean his cheek into X’s palm, closing his eyes. X rested his forehead against Zero’s for a moment before he draped his arms over Zero’s shoulders and folded him into another intoxicating kiss.

            After a few minutes, Zero felt almost like he might fall asleep again, or like he had drunk a cup of wine. All of his senses but touch seemed to be dulled. X’s hands tugging on the back of his shirt sent a swooning sensation down his chest. His heart thrummed for X, who now kissed him fervently, turning his head this way and that, open mouth practically begging for Zero’s tongue.

            Zero had to physically prevent himself from dragging his fingers up X’s back or pressing their hips together. He stopped the kiss, breathing hard, trying to regain his senses.

            “Good morning,” said X against his mouth, a note of smugness in his voice. He kissed the tip of Zero’s nose, and then rolled over onto his back, stifling a yawn. Zero’s mouth twisted into a smile.

            “Technically it’s past noon,” he said. X hit him gently on the arm.

            “Don’t ruin the moment,” he chided.

            But as they sat up, stretching out their sore limbs, Zero’s mind was already on the day ahead of them, and the bloody days behind them. He wondered briefly how many of his soldiers had felt this way about their husbands and wives, and how many families would now be broken after the attack two days ago. His stomach twisted into knots just thinking about asking for assistance at Giga City. He knew that they were running out of options; Captain Marino’s soldiers might be their only hope. Abel was spread too thin.

            “If we go now, we’ll reach Giga City by nightfall,” said Zero. He glanced at X. “Do you feel ready to talk to Captain Marino?”

            X looked at his hands for a moment. “I think with you beside me, I can do most anything.”

            Zero’s heart skipped a beat or two.

            As they gathered up their armor and mounted the horse, X talked quietly about all the things they could look forward to at Giga City. Baths, fresh clothes, real food, he said. Zero knew that he was trying to distract himself from just _why_ they had to go to the city in the first place, but he allowed the prince to continue on. It would come to meet them, sooner or later.

            When they reached the edge of the forest, Zero slowed the horse for a moment. They looked down into the valley, where roads and civilization were finally visible again, parishes dotting the landscape here and there. In the distance a castle with gigantic turrets towered above the city around it.

            Zero spoke quietly. “We shouldn’t be like… like this, in public. I don’t know how it would be taken in this country. And I know that the Abel townspeople would hold no love for it if they came to hear of it, considering my current status as a traitor.”

            X paused for a moment, and then Zero felt him nod slowly. He kissed Zero’s back before sitting up straighter, holding onto Zero’s waist just close enough to stay on the horse.

            “I love you,” he whispered, as they began to move again. It sent a little tingle of joy down Zero’s arms.

 

-

 

            When they reached the walls of Giga City’s castle, Captain Marino was already waiting at the drawbridge to meet them. Zero didn’t know how he had imagined her, but she was a startling sight nonetheless. She stood tall and commanding, wearing a light set of rose gold armor set with sapphires, and a black leather bodice cinched around her waist. A long ponytail rivaling the length of Zero’s own swished from a helmet made of a metal Zero had never seen before. But he was more excited to see the two soldiers accompanying her—Special unit 0 brigadiers. Zero repressed a cry of joy. As soon as they were close he dismounted and went to grasp their arms, trying to show with his eyes how happy he was to see them alive.

            “Captain Marino,” said X, giving a slight bow and a weary smile. “You were expecting us?”

            “Scouts were on the lookout for you. Saw you coming toward the city.” Marino talked brusquely, but her face was pleasant. Zero recognized that if scouts had seen them coming and they hadn’t been attacked, that was a good sign.

            “Come inside,” said the captain. “You two look half-dead. Soldier, take their horse to the stables and have him groomed,” she ordered one of the guards standing nearby, who saluted and went immediately to Zero’s horse. It was obvious that Marino had tight control of her soldiers. Zero admired it, but he also liked Signas’ polite and personable, but firm command.

            “Wait, Captain,” said Zero, as he thought of Signas. “The brigadiers… They told you why we’re here?”

            Marino nodded. “Already sent out two units, with one of my best lieutenants.”

            Zero wanted to cry with gratitude.

             “You are so generous,” said X, the relief in his voice almost palpable.

            Marino shrugged. “Maverick’s expanding our way, and Abel’s been our best trading partner for years. I say it’s time we reformed the old alliance to take down a common enemy.”

            X nodded firmly. “May I speak with King Gaudile and the commanding officers about it tomorrow?”

            The captain nodded, and then waved them inside. Zero silently rejoiced at the prince’s diplomatic demeanor. It seemed to him that X was slowly stepping into his duties. He thought back to the prince’s silent, uncomplaining ride as a disguised soldier as they had left Abel before. He doubted that the X he’d met three years ago would have done such a thing.

            The grand hall of the fortress was round and warm; steps set in the floor led down to a fire pit surrounded by benches and tables.

            “Accommodations are this way,” said Marino, waving them toward one of the many halls branching off from the large room. The whole place was decorated in light stone and dark oak accents. Zero watched X admiring it all as they followed Marino’s march down the hall and up into one of the castle’s many towers. At the top of the steps Marino paused and turned to them, hesitating.

            “Do you two, um… D’you need a room together, or separate?” she asked quietly.

            “Together,” said X, just as Zero said, “Separate.”

            Captain Marino snickered. “It’s a secret, then? Don’t worry, everyone around here’s used to me ‘n’ Cinnamon. And they know to keep their mouths shut.”

            Zero flushed as X turned to him with a pleading expression. He didn’t trust that the servants would keep secrets about foreigners.

            “I can’t stand the thought of you having nightmares all by yourself,” whispered X, “and you said ‘in public’. And… even if it somehow does get out… How long were we going to keep it a secret anyway?”

            “You change your mind fast,” said Zero, irritated, but he couldn’t help himself at X’s pout, and the ache to hold him again. He turned back to Marino, who had been pretending not to listen, and shrugged. “Together, please, Captain.”

            X smiled so wide it made Zero melt a little.

 

-

 

            Finally bathed, well-fed, and wearing soft nightclothes, that night Zero expected to need to exercise a lot of self-restraint as he climbed under the covers. Much to his surprise, however, X simply placed a chaste kiss on his cheek and then settled down, resting his head against the crook of Zero’s neck, one arm wrapped around his waist. Zero cursed himself for overthinking so much.

 

-

 

            The next week went by much slower than Zero would have expected. As it turned out, King Gaudile was not pleasant sort of man, but X came back from his meeting beaming and excited.

            “I did it!” he said. “We arranged an alliance in exchange for some more shares of Abel’s fishing and ore industry, and we’re going to expand and set up sentries on trade routes and put resources into fostering mutual economic…”

            Zero smiled and nodded as X went on, gesticulating happily, but most of it went over his head. When X was finally finished, Zero put a hand on his shoulder.

            “I’m proud of you,” he said.

            X sobered and looked earnestly at him. “Thank you,” he said. “I’m just happy that I accomplished something to protect my people.”

            After that, there was very little to do in Giga City. Zero went along on the tours that Cinnamon gave to X, but it didn’t hold as much interest for him as it did for the prince. He was more concerned about the situation back in Abel, and the thought of it occupied his mind more than anything else. He couldn’t help but feel guilty at the rebellions that were rocking the city from the inside, even though he knew he hadn’t purposely done anything wrong to incite them. He couldn’t decide whether he hoped that Vile had left to go to Sigma or was laying low in Abel.

            The two unit 0 brigadiers informed Zero that they had escaped with another soldier, who was being cared for in the hospital tower. Zero went to visit him once, but the man was barely conscious, and Zero didn’t know what to say to him. He began to wonder when they would go back to Abel. He itched to practice with his sword again, to help Signas and Cain, and to prove his innocence. He watched Captain Marino drilling her soldiers with envy, and when they sat at meals together and she shared intimate little touches with Cinnamon as the two laughed together, he wished that he and X could do the same at home.

            At the end of the week, Zero was getting ready to ask Captain Marino if they could arrange more troops to accompany them back to Abel when a courier arrived on horseback, dressed in Abel’s blue and white colors. He dismounted at the entrance to the grand hall and jogged to X’s side, breathless, before handing him a crumpled letter. As Cinnamon led the courier to the fireside and a stable hand took his horse, X opened the letter and read it, brow furrowing.

            “What does it say? Who’s it from?” asked Zero, watching the exhausted courier with mounting anxiety.

            “It’s from Signas,” said X. He shook his head. “He says the rebellions have been dealt with and to thank Captain Marino. There’s not much else… But he says that we need to come back right away.” He looked up at Zero. “Why would he want us to come back so urgently if the city is doing better?”

            Zero shook his head. He didn’t know, but his chest was tight with dread.

           

           


End file.
